Sunday, 15 November 2015

This Weekend

This weekend ...

... I paid an early morning visit to Sanctum where I listened to an intriguing soundscape and a tap dancer, followed by breakfast at Harts Bakery

... I helped plant an orchard on a derelict plot in Bedminster

... I attended Quaker Meeting for Worship where a Friend reminded us that hope does not always have a happy ending.  It's tenuous and sometimes you have to hold on tight to stop it slipping from your grasp.

Saturday, 14 November 2015

30 Day Vegan Challenge: The Verdict

Post Challenge Breakfast
I had every intention of posting my reflections on my 30 Day Vegan Challenge weeks ago, while it was still fresh in my mind.  However best laid plans ...

Anyway, here goes:

To begin with, it wasn't nearly as difficult as I'd imagined (feared?).  Or at least not for most of the time.

It took me a week or so to find an acceptable substitute for milk in my tea.  I experimented with almond (which curdled!) and oat (which was too watery), before settling on soya, which didn't separate and gave a good colour.  It had a slightly chalky taste which I almost, but not quite, got used to.

I bought a tub of industrial looking vegan sunflower spread which was alright if I spread it thinly and and topped it generously with jam or avocado.  I reluctantly succumbed to a tub of sheeze(!) but had reason to be grateful for it on more than one occasion when I returned home hungry and needed something to keep me going until tea time.

Apart from that it was relatively plain sailing.  I did need to think ahead, but even on days when I failed to do so, I always came up with something perfectly edible.

It helped that I love soup, and virtually anything with rice, pasta, rice noodles or couscous.  As a base for lentils, vegetables or tofu in a tomato or coconut sauce, livened with herbs or spices, the possibilities were endless.

Entertaining at home wasn't a problem.  When my younger daughter arrived with a gaggle of her university friends (one of them a vegan) I was able to offer tasty alternatives to cottage pie, cake and a Sunday morning fry up.  Anna Jones' A Modern Way to Eat was a valuable resource.  Her mushroom biryani which I cooked for for a couple of our friends is bookmarked for future use.

Eating out was almost as easy, with one notable exception.  Bristol is well served with restaurants and cafes offering vegan alternatives which don't leave you feeling you've missed out.  A day trip to Salisbury was trickier.  We stumbled on a brasserie with a fixed price menu offering one vegan sounding dish per course.  I have to admit to not having asked any probing questions for fear of having to go hungry.  The notable exception was a local pub whose only vegan options were a soup and a sharing platter, neither of which constituted a proper meal.

There were a couple of shared meals during the course of the month, both of which offered enough choice to keep me happy.  A friend's kitchen warming party was not so successful, with plates laden with the most gorgeous dairy rich cakes I've seen in a long time.  If it hadn't been for a bowlful of pakoras I'd have wept with frustration.

I lost 2 kg.  Whether this was as a result of cutting out cheese and butter, or being unable to partake of the omnipresent selection of cakes and biscuits in the staffroom, I don't know, but I wasn't complaining.

Having decided to steer clear of meat substitutes and ready made meals (though I discovered a tasty felafel mix and Aldi do excellent burgers), the challenge forced me to cook from scratch, to eat more vegetables (though strangely not more fruit), to rediscover tofu, to introduce nuts and seeds into my diet and to play with colour and texture.

Breakfast on the day after my challenge ended was a bacon and egg fry up washed down with a cup of tea made with cow's milk.  Never did they taste so good.  But it's not been back to business as usual.  Having discovered that I can manage without any meat I'm going to try and live on less, restricting it to the weekend and special occasions and, ideally, as a flavouring rather than the centrepiece of the meal.  I'm back to using milk and butter, but will go easier on the cheese.  There will be more grains and nuts and seeds, and fish from our new fishmonger on Thursdays and Fridays.  And I've got to find space for more (any!) fruit.

Thursday, 8 October 2015

30 Day Vegan Challenge

I'm now 9 days into my 30 Day Vegan Challenge.  Time for a few initial reflections.

  • I've had to accept that my beloved cuppa will never taste as good as it does with cow's milk.  I have been experimenting with some of the impressive range of alternatives.  Soya milk tastes chalky and rice & almond milk curdles.  Oat milk has proved to be the most acceptable, but none of them produce a liquid of the right colour.
  • Porridge, however, is improved with being made with rice and almond milk.  I suspect this will hold true for rice pudding.
  • Avocado on toast makes a good breakfast, spiked with a few drops of Tabasco and a squirt of lemon juice.
  • Vegan margarine looks like it belongs in a garage.
  • You can't go wrong with olive oil, onions, garlic, tomatoes, a tin of beans (any variety) and a shake of dried herbs (again, any variety).  Served with a grain, the job's a good 'un.
  • Vegan risotto is alright, but would be even better with the addition of crispy bacon and a sprinkling of parmesan.
  • Tofu fried until crisp on the edges is a thing of beauty.
  • Adding water to a carrot cake mixture is scary, but it works.
  • Wagamama's Yasai Katsu Curry is yummier than the chicken version (my younger daughter's verdict and, believe you me, she's an expert!).
  • It didn't take long before I relented and bought a tub of 'Sheeze'.
  • Watching The Hairy Bikers and The Great British Bake Off while undertaking this challenge is not helpful (which is when the 'Sheeze' came in handy!).

Tuesday, 22 September 2015

October Challenge: A Preview

Yes I know.  There's still more than a week of September to go, but I'm going to need a little help with my next challenge, so I'm making this appeal in plenty of time to learn from the experiences of others.

My challenge for October is to eat vegan.  For some time now I have been attempting (not always successfully) to be a semi vegetarian, ie restricting meat consumption to the weekends and special occasions.  I'm doing this mainly for ecological reasons, to limit my contribution to greenhouse gas emissions, but also for health reasons, to limit my intake of saturated fat and to hit my 5-a-day target.

However, in October I'm going to try and go one step further and cut out animal products altogether.  At first I thought this would be a doddle, but the more I think about it the more problematic it grows.  My main concerns are around alternatives for milk (I can't do without my morning cuppa!), eggs (no cakes? no puddings?) and cheese (I'm not convinced by any of the alternatives).  What will I eat for breakfast?  What can I order when I eat out?  What can I put on the table when I've only half an hour between getting home from work and going out for the evening?  How can I tell at a glance whether something I pick off the shelf is vegan?  What are the ingredients to look out for?  How can I ensure that I maintain a balanced diet and don't run myself down?

I know there are people out there who have the answers to these questions.  If you're one of them please share your wisdom below.  I will be most grateful.

Tuesday, 1 September 2015

September Challenge

During the month of September I have challenged myself to begin each day with 15 minutes silence.

My normal routine would be to begin the day in a mad rush to shower, dress, grab some breakfast, pack my lunch and hunt for my keys before slamming the front door and haring down the road to get to work on time.  It's not the ideal way to ensure a good day.

As a Quaker attender I have grown to appreciate the value of waiting quietly during Meeting for Worship on Sundays and have decided to introduce it into my daily routine.  I may even try to end the day with a few minutes of silence to prepare me for a good night's rest.

Sunday, 30 August 2015

A Daughter's Secret: A Year in Books

When I popped in to the library last Monday morning to return an overdue book it was with no intention of borrowing another.  A cursory glance around our living room would assure anyone I had enough reading material to keep me entertained for a good few years.  But I can never resist checking out the display of new acquisitions and I had a yearning for a an easier read than any of the volumes in my 'to read' pile at home.

Eleanor Moran's 'a daughter's secret', a tale of two women hiding devastating secrets and needing each other to survive, was irresistible.  I just had to find out whether they learnt to trust each other before it was too late!

Next stop was the doctor's surgery,  I arrived early and decided to get stuck in straight away.  My first reaction was one of bitter disappointment.  I took an instant dislike to the author's vocabulary and use of imagery, so much so that I seriously contemplated returning to the library to swap it for another straight after my appointment.  But I was persuaded by Daisy Goodwin's 'gripping, emotional' review of an earlier novel to give Ms Moran a chance to live up to her reputation.

Having reached the end I'm glad I did.  For although I continued to struggle with her style I was emotionally engaged and gripped by the story.  Even better I found myself in that delicious state of being unwilling to put it down, something I haven't, for various reasons, experienced, but deeply missed for some time now.

So while I don't imagine I'll be scanning the shelves for any of her other novels I'm grateful that 'a daughter's secret' has got me reading again.

When choosing a book I usually read a paragraph selected at random to test whether I'm comfortable with an author's style, and immediately reject anything that jars.  I also admit to judging books by their covers.  How do you choose a new book?  How long do you allow yourself to persist with one which doesn't instantly please?  Is there a particular book you have been unable to finish, despite it being highly recommended?

I'm (rather unsuccessfully so far!) joining in The Year in Books with Laura over at Circle of Pine Trees.   

Sunday, 1 March 2015

March Challenge

During a recent long weekend visiting family in Scotland I was dismayed not only by the sight of so many people glued to their mobiles but, more importantly, by the realisation of how much time I spend checking for updates on my social media sites.  It has become an embarassing habit.

So the challenge for March is to spend less time on my mobile and more time living.  There will be no more peeking at Facebook, Twitter or Instagram at the beginning and end of each day, during breaks at work, on the bus or in cafes.  There's really no need for it.  Instead I will give my full attention to the people I'm with and the world around me, and confine my internet browsing to half an hour or so in the evening.

I'm hoping it will make me more mindful of my surroundings and reduce my stress levels.

Let's see.

Saturday, 28 February 2015

February Challenge: A Review

Although I didn't succeed in buying absolutely nothing in February I did manage to confine my purchases to pretty much the essentials ie food and drink and bus fares.  Drawing up a list of the contents of my kitchen cupboards helped.  However even after a month of raiding the shelves for ingredients they are still remarkably full.  So, as was the case with January's Dump the Junk Challenge, it is definitely work in progress!

Friday, 20 February 2015

Rising Up

 This morning I visited the Rising Up camp off Frenchay Park Road, where a group of people are protesting against the destruction of prime agricultural land in order to develop the site for the Metrobus scheme.

The background and history of this campaign can be found on the Rising Up website.  No one is denying the importance of public transport but the Metrobus scheme has been discredited, while the land it threatens is Grade 1-3 Best and Most Versatile soil and home to smallholdings and allotments.  All this takes place in Bristol's year as Green Capital of Europe and the United Nations' Year of the Soils!

Back to the camp which is well organised but, after yesterday's rain, is wet and muddy.  The site is dotted with tents pitched on pallets to keep them dry, a communal kitchen with a fire on which to cook and gather round to eat, and a compost loo.  There are variety of shelters in the trees, including one designed as a birdbox, and protestors take it in turns to sleep up in the branches.

I spent an hour or so looking round the site and chatting to the protestors, asking them why they were there and how they were coping with living in the wild.  They are a diverse bunch of individuals but with a single commitment, to protect this piece of precious land from the developers.  I admire their courage and determination and feel slightly ashamed of my reluctance to join them.  I left them a rucksackful of food and a gingerbread cake by way of compensation.

If you live in or around Bristol and would like to support them in some way they have drawn up a list of  ten things you might like to do.

Wednesday, 4 February 2015

Wolf Hall: The Year in Books

I was only a day late in finishing my January book (We Are All Completely Beside Ourselves by Karen Joy Fowler).  However, considering I was only a third of the way through it on Friday, I was rather pleased with myself.  On the Saturday and Sunday afternoons I did what I haven't done in a long time.  I curled up under my fleece blanket on the sofa with a mug of tea and read for a few hours.  It was sheer luxury.

So, what did I make of it?  I'm not sure.  I raced through the first few chapters and then ran out of steam.  I only had enough time to read a few pages a day which didn't work well with the non linear narrative.  I had to keep flicking back through the pages to refresh my memory.  It wasn't until the weekend that I go back into the story.  

It's a tricky book to review on account of the dramatic twist it takes fairly early on and which is intrinsic to the story line.  I wouldn't want to spoil it for anyone.  So I'll settle for saying that I enjoyed it, but no more than that.  It's carefully researched, well written and the story moves on apace.  It deals with a fascinating subject.   But I didn't really care very much for any of the characters and it ultimately failed to grip me.

My book for February is Wolf Hall by Hilary Mantel.  I bought the hardback copy for £3 from a charity shop some time ago and hoped to have it read by the time the TV series began.  I didn't but watching it has inspired me to pick it up again.  I'm taking it up to Glasgow next weekend to leave it with my daughter so I'll have to get a move on.

I'm joining in The Year in Books with Laura over at Circle of Pine Trees.

Sunday, 1 February 2015

February Challenge

Having got rid of 396 bits of stuff last month I am anxious not to replace them.  So my challenge for February is not to buy anything I don't need.

My original plan was to restrict this to non food items.  However, given that I don't normally buy an awful lot else, and having enough on my shelves and in the freezer to provide us with the foundation for a good many meals, I've decided to extend it to include food.

Part of the reason for this glut is not checking what I have before going out shopping and coming home with stuff already in stock.  So the first step is to make a list.

Meanwhile I have today bought the following:

3 kg of demerara sugar
for a second batch of marmalade
essential to catch the Seville oranges before they disappear from the greengrocers

1 tin of chickpeas
to make a bowl of hummus
 to eat with the loaf of semolina and sesame seed bread I bought at Mark's Bread yesterday

Tonight's dinner (Thai green curry with noodles) will be prepared entirely from stock.

Saturday, 31 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 31

31 marbles.

The end of the challenge.

When I finally cart the last load of junk down to the charity shop next week my house will contain 496 fewer things than it did at the beginning of the month.

To be honest there were times when I wondered whether I'd find enough stuff to get rid of.  It turns out I needn't have worried.  I could carry on dumping for (at least!) another month.  The real challenge lay in sorting through drawers, cupboards and shelves, identifying items, cleaning them, deciding where they should go and disposing of them.

There were days when I struggled to find time to gather enough together, days when I had to play catch up.  But it's been a strangely liberating, almost addictive experience, and one which I vow to continue, in a less formal manner, until I reach a comfortable balance with regard to my possessions.

My thanks to Mrs Green at My Zero Waste for inspiring me to embark on this journey.  

Friday, 30 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Days 28-30

Once again time has been against me.  So here you have it - three days for the price of one!

Day 28
I've been rifling through my wardrobe and have am horrified to discover how many coat hangers I possess.  I've kept the good ones, but am getting rid of the flimsy ones cashiers automatically slip into your bag.  I now make a point of refusing them, for reasons apparent from the picture above! 

Day 29
A pile of some of the clothes I'm dumping.  My wardrobe is still full of garments I hope to fit into again one day.  They are now on borrowed time.

The hoop at the back is a canopy my younger daughter would have liked suspended over her bed but, for various reasons, it never even emerged from its packaging.  Hey ho!

Day 30
I said I'd discovered a wardrobeful of coat hangers!

I'm not sure what to do with them.  I'll check whether any of our local charity shops would like them.  If not I'm afraid I'll have to bin them.  

Unless anyone has any novel suggestions?

Tuesday, 27 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Days 22 - 27

A combination of long hours at work, hosting a French student and delivering leaflets for the Green Party has left me with little time to sort, count and photo my daily collections.
  However I have been continuing to dump junk.
  Here's the evidence.

Day 22
More clothes, including two gowns (one adult, one child) commissioned for a Harry Potter themed birthday party.

Day 23
More plastic cutlery!

Day 24
I made a batch of Seville orange marmalade and, rifling through my collection of lids, I decided to bin any that were less than perfect.  The stripey socks date from my girls' secondary school days and the Barbie kite to when they were still in primary school!   

Day 25
I cleared out a drawer-full of old gift bags.  Most of them will end up in the recycling bin but I managed to salvage a few for the charity shop. 

Day 26
The last of the plastic cutlery (yeah!) displayed on an old tea towel to mark the day when the Church of England finally got round to consecrating a woman bishop!  

Day 27
I ventured under our bed and found a pile of old crockery.  The egg poaching pan has been claimed by a colleague at work.  And I never really felt comfortable in those thongs!

Back up to date again!

Wednesday, 21 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 21

A still life made up of a strange assortment of junk: straws from children's drinking bottles, stirrers, a wooden clothes pegs, bottle stoppers, a birthday candle, a pressure cooker weight and a device to prevent drips on wine bottles!  My kitchen drawer is now a lot tidier.

Tuesday, 20 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 20

I've been very busy at work and at home the past few days, unable to rummage around for more junk to dump.  Fortunately I'd already unearthed a carrier bagful of plastic cutlery.  The plan was that I would reuse them for parties, picnics etc but in reality they've spent the last however many years buried in a drawer.  Time to go!

I'm now two thirds of the way through the challenge and 210 items lighter.  I feel sure I 've enough junk to hit my target of 386 items.  I'm just short of the time it takes to sort them out.  But I'm determined to give it my best shot.

Monday, 19 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 19

A motley assortment of old bags, threadbare towels, a dull downie cover, an unwanted dressing gown and six sock hangers.  The sock hangers are what remains of a packet I bought for the the girls' Advent calendars.  I thought they might be useful - but I was wrong!

Sunday, 18 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 18

A mixed pile of books.  The Kitchen Yearbook at the bottom belongs to my sister and will be returned to her next month.  Sarah Brown and Rose Elliot were my cooking gurus way back in the 70s and 80s and even their names bring back fond memories of those days.  I feel guilty for giving away their books, but it's been a while since I referred to either of them.  There are a few I've never opened and a couple I didn't finish.  Their time on my bookshelves is over.

Saturday, 17 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 17

Today's collection illustrates the extent of my hoarding tendencies.  An exploration of our bathroom cupboard revealed a packet of Napisan and a bottle of baby lotion.  For goodness sake!  My younger daughter is now 20 years old!!!

On the plus side, I have also discovered that I will not not need to buy any toiletries for the forseeable future as  I have enough to stock a small chemist's shop!

Friday, 16 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 16


Today's offering is a pile of children's books, including a boxed set of 10 Roald Dahl books.  I started reading James and the Giant Peach to my daughter when she was young, took a dislike to it and haven't read another once since.  Was I wrong?  Anyway, the collection deserves to grace the bookshelf of someone more appreciative of his works than I've been.

Thursday, 15 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 15

I didn't have time to photograph today's collection of junk until this evening, hence the poor quality.  I'm sure I could have managed a better shot if I'd taken the time to acquaint myself with my mobile phone's settings, but that's another challenge!

The napkin rings are from Pier, a shop I still miss, especially at Christmas.

At Day 15 I'm now half way through the challenge, but at 120 only a quarter of the way through the total number of items to be dumped.  I wonder whether I'll be able to find another 376 to get rid of?

Wednesday, 14 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 14

Back to the wardrobe, drawers and coat pegs to produce a taller pile than before.  The white towelling bundle is a lovely soft dressing gown, spoilt (for me at any rate) by the Guinness logo on the cuffs and collar!  Alan's got one in black which doesn't bother him.

When I posted the last collection of clothes my younger daughter complained I'd given away a spotty top she'd had her eye on.  So I've checked in advance this time.

Tuesday, 13 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 13

Today I turned my attention to the bathroom cupboard where I unearthed this bagful of out of date medicines.  I suspect this is only the tip of the iceberg!  The upside is that, given the stash of toiletries I've discovered, I'll be saving a small fortune in the weeks (months?) ahead.

Monday, 12 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 12

I had to snap today's collection before shooting out the door tow work this morning.  The solar powered calculator no longer works and one of the bowls is badly scratched but the Tupperware blue shaker has hardly been used.  I have another one in my kitchen cupboard but it's missing its lid so has won a reprieve until it turns up elsewhere.  The black candle holder has a charming rustic appearance but is not very steady,  And does anyone else remember the Hama bead craze?

Sunday, 11 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 11

Another motley assortment of kitchen/dining room items.  The food warmer takes me back to meals shared with friends in London in the 80s but, rarely having used it since we moved to Bristol 24 years ago, I think it's had its day.  The yellow silicone egg poachers were more trouble than they were worth and my girls are way too old for a teddy bear shaped birthday cake!

All but the two rusty dented baking trays are on their way to the charity shop, who are doing rather well out of me at the moment.

Saturday, 10 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 10

A collection of art materials, used a couple of times, then consigned to a cupboard.  I'm hoping someone else will make better use of them.

Friday, 9 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 9

I've been attacking my ironing pile before it topples over.  Yes, I know that if I were to hang wet clothes up straight they could be folded and put away without needing to be ironed, but I prefer pressed clothes - and sheets! and tea towels! - but I draw the line at knickers!  And I quite like ironing, especially in the company of Radio 4, and take pleasure in transforming a crumpled heap of clothes into a pile of crisply folded garments.

I picked out a few items that I no longer wear and these have now been taken down to my favourite charity shop.  Next stop my wardrobe!

Thursday, 8 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 8

These Ikea place mats once seemed a good idea.  They will soon be on their way to brighten up someone else's dining table.

Wednesday, 7 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 7 (+ Review of Week 1)

These old alumnium foil trays have loitered too long on the top shelf of my kitchen cupboard.  I harboured good intentions of reusing them, but never did, and probably never will.  I held on to them out of guilt for buying cheap disposables in the first place.  Fortunately our council recycles foil so they're in the black bin waiting for Friday's collection and I won't be buying any more.   

Week 1
So far so good.  Working through cupboards and drawers I've had no difficulty finding items I can happily part with.  It's as if this challenge has given me permission to dump stuff  I've been wanting to get rid of for years but never felt confident enough to do so.

You should try it.

Tuesday, 6 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 6

We are family that like our games and have built up quite a collection.  But we have grown out of some of them.  I consulted the girls before dumping these.  The Harry Potter board game was vetoed and put back in the cupboard, but I have permission to take these ones down to the charity shop.

PS  I do apologise for the quality of my recent photographs.  The days may be getting longer but I still find myself trying to conjure up enough natural light in the evenings.  I didn't do very well with this one!  

The Year in Books

I have joined Circle of Pine Trees' A Year in Books project.  This is a virtual reading group in which members choose their own book of the month and post a brief review of it for others to share.  There is also a plan for everyone to read the same book one month.  Pop over forLaura's far more coherent explanation here.

Anyway, I have chosen We are all Completely Beside Ourselves by Karen Joy Fowler for January, or rather it was chosen for me by my husband who included it in my Christmas stocking.  It's my first of her books and I'm looking forward to reading a new author.

Monday, 5 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 5

My aim in this challenge is to dump my junk sustainably, recycling or donating the majority of it.  However I'm resigned to the fact that this won't be possible with each and every one of the 300+ items.  Today's fall into this category - a leaky liquidiser jug, and attachments to a food processor that broke years ago.  I'm afraid they'll been consigned to the landfill bin.

Sunday, 4 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 4

I bought these ice cream glasses for my daughters years ago from a charity shop.  Or was it a jumble sale?  Anyway I don't remember using them more than a couple of times.  So they're going back to where they came from.

Saturday, 3 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 3

I raided my dusty shoe box in the hall and found these.  Only the white heeled pair in the middle are worthy of the charity shop.  The other two are unwearable, which begs the question why they weren't binned* years ago!

* ie consigned to the recycling box which is where they are heading today.

Friday, 2 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 2

I found these two wooden pegs while clearing out one of my kitchen drawers.  I'm sure some crafty person could create a couple of delightful dolls with them, but that person is not me.  So I'm donating them to a charity shop.

Thursday, 1 January 2015

Dump Your Junk: Day 1

Because I would like this challenge to be more than just getting rid of stuff (although that is of course the name of the game), I thought I would chose my first item with care.

It is a book that I read some years ago and mostly enjoyed, but which I do not feel the urge to open again.  There's something so seductive about a living room lined with book shelves, and we do have a respectable collection.  But books are not meant for decoration.  They're meant to be read, and if I'm not going to read this one again then it should go to someone who will enjoy it.

So today I released it into the wild ie I left it on a chair in Zazu's Kitchen for someone else to pick up.  I've registered it on the BookCrossing website and stuck a label on the first page so that the finder can look it up and, when s/he's finished with it, can send it on its way again.

I've been releasing books on and off for the last six years, 19 to date, of which I've only been able to track three.  However one of these did end up in Arlington, Virginia.

I wonder what will happen to Chocolat.

Bon voyage!